The cruelest contemporary joke that could possibly be played on Dr. Sam Beckett would be to force his leap into Derek Chauvin.
In 2020, the erstwhile Minnesota cop became the most hated man in America.
And if you’re wondering who’s Sam, he’s this guy:
Please tell me you know this fantastic show, and if not, that you’ll soon learn of it.
As for Derek, perhaps he’s seen every episode — they say there’s a lot of downtime in maximum-security prison.
Not that he’s any longer inside: The mid-forties man charged with second-degree murder, third-degree murder, and second-degree manslaughter was released via a $1 million bond in October, awaiting a March 8th trial in the terrible death of George Floyd.
Still, he’s likely remained confined — showing his face around town might not be a wise move.
Speaking of moves, his wife has moved on.
And up: According to the Minneapolis Star Tribune, Kellie Chauvin — who left her kissing companion in May after a decade of marriage — looks to be making out:
New court filings show that the estranged wife…could be awarded about two-thirds of the couple’s assets in a divorce that was previously flagged by a judge for possible fraud.
A detailed division of their two homes, multiple bank accounts and debts show that Kellie Chauvin would receive $703,717.69 while Derek Chauvin would receive $420,768.22.
All that, on a police officer’s salary?
It would’ve been more — according to court documents, resale on the house was hurt by damage via vandalism.
As told by the Tribune, the former Miss Minnesota and her ex-officer filed the settlement proposal in early December, followed by a public refiling last week on the advisement of Washington County District Judge Juanita Freeman.
In October, Juanita rejected the couple’s first offer because it gave Kellie “most of their assets.”
However, divorce attorney Marc Beyer reviewed the goings-on and doubts the rejection was about the pair’s pie-slicing:
“I don’t think this resolves the judge’s concern about possible fraud, as she presumably wanted to see a more equal division. It only highlights it even more. In so many words, [Freeman] pretty much told them that they can’t award all of the marital assets to [Kellie Chauvin], but this still does that.”
The judge hasn’t yet ruled on the second offer.
Yet, it may be the generous split isn’t quite how it looks.
The Chauvins’ divorce has come under scrutiny as some question whether it’s a strategic move to protect their assets from civil litigation. Kellie Chauvin filed for divorce on May 31, two days after her husband was charged in Floyd’s May 25 death.
Attorneys for Floyd’s family later filed a federal lawsuit against the city of Minneapolis, Chauvin and three of his former colleagues who assisted in Floyd’s arrest: J. Alexander Kueng, Thomas Lane and Tou Thao.
Here’s what Judge Juanita wrote in October:
“The Court has a duty to ensure that marriage dissolution agreements are fair and equitable. One badge of fraud is a party’s transfer of ‘substantially all’ of his or her assets.”
Over the summer, Kellie was caught in the cloud of controversy prompted by Derek’s abominable decision to keep his knee on George Floyd’s neck no matter what.
As stated in the filings, she lost her realtor job and was left unable to work due to safety concerns.
But Kellie’s got cash comin’:
She would…receive the title to their Florida townhouse, which was valued at $226,282 before it was vandalized after Floyd’s death. [She’s] also expected to incur the unknown cost of damage caused to other buildings in their association.
Kellie Chauvin would receive a substantial amount of money from Derek Chauvin’s Minnesota Deferred Compensation Plan, Roth IRA, Health Care Savings Plan and pension, totaling $754,911.82.
And how do you know a woman’s done?
When, after a divorce, she legally changes — not only her last name, but — her first.
From the very end of the Tribune article:
An earlier version of this story included the proposed new name of Kellie Chauvin. That name has been removed to protect her safety.
You might have to choose a new one now, Mrs. C.
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